Well, Life the past 4 months have been the craziest of my entire life.... long story short I tried to do too much and failed and developed an anxiety disorder which then causes me to get pretty depressed and overwhelmed. I am now on medications for those and for the most part I am better, I am just tired of the daily grind... you know SSDD (same shit different day for those who are slow). Well, lets see what else, Liz and I broke up back in Feb, then in Aug, at the height of my anxiety and me moving back to Rochester we got back together only to have her break up with me on my birthday a few weeks ago... oh well life goes on. My computer died, well the motherboard did, I did it tho, I was in a manic state (on my meds I sometimes get overhyperactive and do silly shit; manic) and pulled out my PCI nic and it died... it was on, I am not bright, but I bought a Dell. 5000+ X2 Dual core amd, 2 gig ddr2 sdram at 533 mhz, dual channel, 250 gig raid hd, 7300le nvidia PCI-E 256 with turbo cache... media center XP... um, cant really think of anything else that stands out. My physical health, the kidney disease is under control and is not causing me much trouble these days. I'm really happy that I am working a lot, keeps me busy, I enjoy my co-workers company and its just nice to have people to talk to, in the cities I was alone a lot, and my job was fucking terrible, they fucked me so hard my ass is still sore, a joke for those who can't read sarcasm. For all those who like Indie-ish kinda poppy-rock go buy some Minus the Bear, its the shit, they have some really catchy tunes. If anyone has ever dealt with anxiety or is now dealing with it knows how intensly it can harm you both physically and mentally and it is terrible! It has on many occasions been physically dibilitating, it brings me to my knees sometimes and I can do nothing about it, well pills help now, but before I felt that if I did nothing to help myself I would just waste away in my room becuase I was so terrified of everything in life. Also, if you have dealt with it or dealing with it and need someone to talk to hit me up on AIM... MSN will be back in a while once the new comp comes. Something I want to stress to people, if you read this, is that a mental illness is not a weakness, its a disease, like any other, it requires attention and sometimes medication, living with it wont help... get help, I know if I hadn't that I'm not sure I'd still be here, a scary thought, but true.